Love is never wrong............

Looking forward
counting days
to when I can hold
my Honey in my arms
again

something wrong
something bad,
first time it was
family that tried
to keep us apart

that was solved
after meeting with me
finding out that I am
really a good person

something wrong
something bad
second time
it was boss being
the bad guy keeping
us apart, we trade places
I came over, instead of honey
and son, they didn't hold us back

something good
something bad,
now paperwork is trying
to hold us apart from each other again
its wearing me out

tension, uncertainty
if this time my honey and son
will be home in summer
passport is hard to get
course they decided to change
the rules, right under our noses

why is family, bosses, government
trying to keep us apart
don't they know, we only
fight harder, faster and meaner
to be together

don't they know
Love is never wrong?

Time........

An hour forward
an hour back,
time is stolen from us
and we're not getting it back

daylight saving starts today
in Europe
Bush made the USA start
3 weeks ago
and now they take it back
the hour we had extra
to spend with each other

never time
so much time difference
I go to bed when my honey
is getting ready with dinner
in the middle of the night
for me like 3 am in the morning
is only 8 pm for her

loving, missing, crying, begging
laughing, needing, wanting
wondering why there is never
enough time for us
why there isn't an easy simple
and working solution for us to
be together

struggling timezone to timezone
and now 2 years later
there is still no time
no time to spend with each other
phone call to phone call
timezone to timezone
country to country
time................

Full head, empty bucket

I want to write
course i don't do it
as often as i should
but my mind can't find
the words and my fingers refuse
it's weird how at times
your head can be full of
things that didn't seemed
important in an earlier stage
of you're life
while they're keeping you busy now

I worry about so many things
the environment
I do that a while, I do as many as
one person can do
ride my bike everyday
separate garbage,
watch electrics, gas and water

I worry about my health
little pains that don't seem to
go away, but also don't bother you
all day.

violence around you and then
when this lady cut me off
while I was riding my bike
I gave her the finger and when she
stopped and yelled at me
I told her I would punch her in the
face if she wouldn't leave like NOW
(I would never hit someone, never did never will)
she glared at me, and left........

My future..........
with my girl, 5000 miles away,
her health, our sons health,
his raising,her stress,
his school, her worries,
his sports, her pain,
his bedtime.......
her big heart.........forgetting about herself..........
and I am not there........
not there to take care of it all......

I wish sometimes
I could poor out my head
as a bucket,
empty it, so good new things,
love, and opportunities can fill it up again
full head, empty bucket.........

my first time........

It was my first time
never done it before
I was really nervous at first
it got better once i got there
i had my first session
with a psychologist

Nothing bad,
just need to get some stuff
that had a huge impact on my life
off my chest
to heavy to carry
to much load to bare

Of course my parents
where under fire
and it strikes me how weird
I think my folks are.
Like today I called them
told them I went in for the first time
and all they said was " oh"

that was it "oh"
what can I make of that?
not a how did it go?
or are you OK?
what did you talk about?
just "oh"

I am going to try that with them
sometime just "oh"
I am bad like that,
I want their response on
the crap the pull with "oh"

but I'm growing
back to who I was
I have a wonderful woman
by my side
she is making me stronger
than I've ever been.

she is restoring my faith
in people again
believing in love and understanding
trusting on the will of you're own good heart

I have a long road to go
been beaten up and betrayed too
many times
by so called friends, lying in my face
using me for their own good

I was dumb, stupid and ignorant
I am a stronger woman now
independent and loving
a one woman woman
and in love than never before

thank you angel, for believing, loving,
trusting and standing by me all the way.